#2 About Being a Parent

Spoiler alert....my kids are older. Two amazing young women who are making their way in this world. Most times they do fine without me or their dad. Occasionally they need us, and that is really nice. But I don't want to talk about them as the fabulous adults they are becoming. 

I want to talk about parenting young kids. Like, who thought it would be a good idea to make young adults (some younger than others) in charge of little humans who come into this world completely helpless? 

But here's the thing....how do we know how to do it all? Of course we are lucky if we have a support system, our parents, siblings or trusted friends to guide us. I don't believe it is an instinct, somehow we learn by doing. 

I have some dear friends who started out their married years by getting a dog. They said they were practicing for when they had kids. I have rarely seen a better behaved dog than that one was. Since, they have raised two great kids of their own. 

I remember when my kids were really young (like day care aged) ALWAYS being tired. From the moment I woke up I was running. Taking care of myself plus two little humans was exhausting. And I had help! I'm lucky that my hubs is a trained chef, so he has always been in charge of the food stuff around here. But having that partner also brings in other issues. We were raised differently, so we approached parenting differently. Throw in that one of us is a teacher, which by default means LOTS more kid experience, and another layer of issues arises. 

I have worked with people who are not parents. They can be quick to blame all of a child's differences/issues on the parent(s).  Working in education for 25 plus years,  I have met my share of whacky parents. But even the wackiest, I believe, were doing what they thought was best for their children. They were learning as they go and doing the best they can. Just like the rest of us. Exhaustingly trying to do our best to raise those littles into people who would make this world a better place. And guess what? Their reading scores, mastery of 'fast facts' and ability to write a complete sentence was NOT, for the most part, at the forefront of our minds. 

No, we were trying to help them be happy, kind, caring, strong, individuals and that is more difficult and harrowing work than anyone who is not a parent can understand. Just like anyone who is not a teacher cannot possibly understand the challenges of this wonderful, exhausting, challenging job we educators do. 

The only thing I can allow myself to believe is that those who do it well are just like any parent. Doing our best, learning along the way and doing what we believe is the best thing for each child. So there you have it. Parenting, like teaching, is them most satisfying terrifying thing a person can do. If we do it well, we end up with some great humans who can make this world a little better by being in it.